A question was posed to me on Quora today and the question was, have I ever asked myself, “Why me?” – My response was yes; I have asked myself “Why me?”  – I now ask myself, “Why not me?”

When I think back to when I’ve asked myself, “Why me?” I was in a space where I felt powerless to make any solid changes. Asking myself that question only helped me to trade my inner power for victimization of self. Placing myself in a victimized mental state with repetitive closed ended questioning drained me of my energy. It’s not that I desired to think like this or feel this way, but I honestly didn’t know how to think any differently. It was very hard for me to create the life I wanted while continuing to think in the same way. I got fed up and decided to ask the question a different way. I began asking the question in a way that helped position me to open up my mind in order to perceive things in a way that worked for me, not against me. 

Changing the way that I asked this question, empowered me to become an active participant in the life that I desired. I started asking myself, “Why not me?” This new style of how I examined the question, positioned me to look at things transparently and in a matter of fact kind of way. In this new space my ability to go from victim to victor happened very quickly for me. When I changed my perception, I changed my life. 

In the event that I am not pleased with my current version of reality, I still ask myself, “Why not me”? I do this because it is imperative that I recognize the role that I play in my life, as well as the lives of others around me. If I need to make changes, so be it. At that point instead of beating myself up or feeling bad about my circumstances, I take action in pursuing the steps necessary for the change I wish to create. In doing so, I enforce the transformation effortlessly. I can choose to be a victim, or I can choose to be victorious in all things. 

“Why not me?”

I have seen far too many times than I’d like to recount the abuse and misuse we place upon ourselves. We can give love, attention and kindness to others but fail to give it to ourselves. Becoming unbalanced we drain ourselves and can’t seem to find any reasons as to why. Generational curses and religion bind us with thoughts of who we shouldbe and what needs to be done in order to be sinless. That sounds like pressure and God’s yoke is easyand burdens lightso what are we missing? The truth is this, to sin is to miss the mark of unconditional love, period. Unconditional love isn’t earned, it’s simply given. Yet, conditional love is how we’ve been taught to love others as well as ourselves. We all have done this so there isn’t any blame at all. We teach what we learn. It’s time that we retrain and teach in a different way. Do you agree?

To sin, means what exactly? How much do we really know? According to Wikipedia, sin is an act of transgression (sin, trespass, violation, wrongdoing) against divine or natural law. Sin can also be viewed as any thought or action that endangers the ideal relationship between an individual and God; or as any diversion from the perceived ideal order for human living. So, if sin is an act of transgression against divine or natural law – what is divine or natural law? Webster’s Dictionary stated natural law is: a body of law or a specific principle held to be derived from nature and binding upon human society in the absence of or in addition to positive law and divine definition is this: of, relating to, or proceeding directly from God. To miss the mark is to see division and inequity. To miss the mark means to judge according to the limited mental knowledge we consume. There is only one consciousness that knows all and sees all, the master of the Universe, God; only God can judge.  

What is the definition of love?  Biblically -1 Corinthians 13:4-7 New International Version (NIV) states:Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. And, according to Merriam Webster’s Dictionary, love: strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties maternal love for a child. We claim love is unconditional, but all the conditions are artifacts we use, when giving love. Condition is all we seem to live by, all we seem to know. 

Do we love in an unconditional manner, or do we condemn and hate the unfavorable? The unfavorable can even be us, after all the worse condemnation is condemnation of self. We cannot change the world unless we first change ourselves. Changing the misconception requiresallto be healed, not just a few. We are here to learn that unconditionalis the only way to love. Limitless, pure potentiality at its best is love. Harming oneself and another by placing boundaries on the level of love being given, based on their circumstances and learnedbehavior; how is it that we claim to love in this way? 

To sin: is to notsee yourself and others how God perceives you, perfect. To be sinless: walk in acceptance and love. To be sinless: embrace who you are, flaws and all. To be sinless: avoidance of comparison; you are you, embrace, don’t reject that fact. To be sinless: is to see love in another, through the awareness in you

1 John 4:18 states: There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.When we are fearful or doubtful, we are not walking in love; but in disapproval of ourselves. This disapproval bleeds into our relationships, finances and so on. Fear wreaks havoc on our lives and will take over if we aren’t aware of what’s true for us. The bible states God’s people parish from lack of wisdom and this is because we have taken on the beliefs of the world as opposed to staying close to the spirit who lives in us. The mind is filled with hogwash from eons ago and we base our lives on the intelligence of our minds. When we do this, we turn away from our spirit. If we decide to live through our mental conditioned self (ego) instead of who we are internally (spirit) we become divided. Division leads to ruin. Ruin leads to death. 

We were not to become like the world but be lights of the world, by being transformed and renewed through the retraining of our minds. The bible instructs us to be diligent in retraining our minds to not adapt the societal divisions of the world. In Romans 12:2 we are told not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.We fear the unknown based on limiting beliefs of the world. This isn’t love. Fear and love cannot coexist. Fear harms, love heals and restores. Fear divides, love conquers all. Let me be clear, our way of doing things based on mental concepts or conditioning alone, will neverwork in leading us to our destiny. We must be present and aligned in order for limitless pure potentiality to flow within us. 

But how do we usually practice love? I don’t know about you but here’s what I see: Conditional love given when things go how we thinkthey should. Usually we love ourselves when our life is in order, just how we like it. Otherwise, we beat ourselves up, feel guilty and wonder what we are doing wrong. We compare ourselves and our lives to everyone else. We then push ourselves to go the extra mile, hoping someone would notice. Simply put, we look for gratification and love in others. We love our spouse when they take the time to give us the attention we crave; otherwise we complain and withdrawal, we might even be mean. We openly love and praise our children when they are making straight A’s and enjoying extra circular activities; otherwise we continuously let our disappointments be known; compare and punish for falling short of what we expect them to be. We are courteous and respectful to the CEO, nevertheless the Janitor can’t even get a hello. We praise the rich, look down on the poor. And finally, we walk around with fake smiles and shattered hearts, not knowing how to mend it at all. We have been hurt. We have become broken pieces of what love is supposed to be. Sounds like loving based on condition to me. 

How are we loving and complaining at the same time? We are not. How are we loving and angry at the same time? We are not. How are we loving, yet condemning, placing blame and pointing fingers? We are not. We are either choosing to love or we are feeding the conditioned picture of division and condemnation, which is simply serving the dysfunction of this world. Anything divided will not and cannot stand. If we are complaining based on falling short of the perfection, we think we should be living up to we aren’t loving ourselves; this is beating ourselves up unnecessarily. 

We are on a journey in this life and we will get to our destined place, if we know and practice the truth that sets us free. There isn’t any love in condemnation. To love is to be free. To love is to allow. To love is to grow. To love is to nurture. To love is to embrace the newness of what can be. To love is to love yourself and others exactly as we are, expressions of love. Love isn’t based on habituated illusions of what we think shouldbe.  

We know in order to receive, we must give first. If we aren’t giving love and acceptance to ourselves, how will we continue to grow? Voids that won’t go away is a sure sign that love needs to be replenished on the inside. If the love we see is limited to outside sources, does that mean love can only be conquered through something or someone else? Think about that for a second. The storm and the calm can only be felt first, within. So, in other words anything that rest outside of you can never fill the emptiness that’s felt within you. But on the contrary, once the emptiness has been filled on the inside, outside desires begin to come into fruition, automatically.  

Fall in love with the essence of life. Fall in love with the beauty in, through and around you. Begin to wake up and feel life, in totality again. Fall in love, in spite of. Make a choice to walk in love. Fall in love with the being that is, you. Far too many times than not, we see love and joy in everything but ourselves. But, how is this so? How can we see in others, what we refuse to see in ourselves? If in fact we areable to perceive greatness in others, doesn’t that mean, what we see in others, is also in ourselves. Love is unconditional. Love is you. 

 

I’ve learned universal consciousness is in control, not me. Even when I think I know the outcome, truth is, I do not. I must simply wait and see. Life has taught me to always think, feel and hope for the best because doing anything less, will only aid in mental, maybe even physical imprisonment. We all know, focusing on the lows of life, enables low vibrations, causing fearful thoughts which begin to block our vision, engulfing our creativity.  

Love better, think better, do better and feel better is the new motto I wish for all to adapt. 

Dione Howard

I’ve learned, what I want, I must give, regardless of the expected outcome I‘ve decided to conjure up in my head. Life has taught me to be a master of my thought process, even in my emotions then simply wait with great expectancy, see what life has to offer me!

I’ve learned not to agree with other people’s opinions but to find out what’s true for me, instead. Other people are still learning themselves, learning about life how could they possibly give me a clear picture of me? Fact is, no they cannot. No person, thing or situation has authority over me, unless I decide to make it so, mentally. 

I’ve learned that even when I think things are extremely f*cked up, they’re not. Life’s apparent set backs are just set ups, which prepare us for the greater good that’s truly meant to be brought about, for all of us. My part in this dream called life is simply this, to be present, be aware of how I decide to utilize the energy within me. To be a conscience participant of my creations, not a victim, but a victor of the reality I help to create for myself. 

Life has taught me that the overly prideful will be brought to their knees and we never know if its going to be literal or figuratively, maybe even both. The same thing rings true for the individual who suffers from the “woe is me” syndrome…. if you keep telling life you’re the victim, you will be. We in fact do receive what we believe to be true for us. Yes, we reap what we sow, in other words what we put out will come back, as this is one of many universal laws. 

I have learned giving people authority over your ability to succeed or fail is ultimately a choice. Being angry and bitter causes irritability, cancer and high blood pressure, just to name a few.  You’re only hurting you. Being angry is giving a foothold to a force you don’t want to be a part of, do you?  Focusing on good vibes only can help transform this hurtful thought pattern. 

Life has taught me to keep moving forward and never stop working toward anything I want, never focusing on what I do not. Life has taught me to appreciate each day that’s being offered, as each day is a gift that I gladly accept! As we all know, our next breath is not promised so let’s rejoice and make the most out of life. Feed and focus on only what we wish to create. 

Change your mind, how do you ask? I say by simply deciding to do so. Change your mind. Its impossible you say but no, it’s not impossible. All things are possible within you and me. The question is, do you believe it’s possible? Your belief is key. Where there isn’t any belief, there isn’t any power you see. Change your mind it’s for the best. What we create comes from our precepts. Precepts that were learned and accepted by us continue to recirculate and condemn us.  Are we living according to a new or an old belief system? Are your precepts keeping you accepting, loving and understanding or causing strife, condemnation and separation among you? If you’re in a state of unhappiness I say the latter is true.

Change your mind, undue the cruelty of unjust opinions that have been thrown at you. Change your mind and forgive. Forgiveness isn’t for the people who have caused harm to you. Forgiveness frees you from the pain that binds you. So no, forgiveness isn’t for them, it’s for you.  Change your mind, you were made perfect and your job on earth is to love and accept yourself as such knowing you are very much so deserving. The way you live and walk in your purpose is to not allow old precepts steal your joy and focus. Change your mind all things great depend on it.

Listen for the negativity your mind continues to feed you then lovingly redirect those thoughts by replacing them with positive talk. Change your mind by being aware of what it is you’re thinking about then redirect thoughts free of judgment full of acceptance and understanding. Change your mind, create happiness, the lie of being underserving is no good for you. Change your mind from the things you see and create from a state of love and peace. Change your mind from anything that doesn’t benefit to all things that do. Reflect on all things great. When you do this your awareness makes a shift from dormant to awake! The power within you begins to take over for you. Your life has begun to change and you feel a strong desire for more! No longer defeated but now you feel strong! Your focus has gone from negative to positive and all you had to do was change your mind and be diligent at it.

Changing your mind is simply another decision to go in the opposite direction.  Which direction have you decided on? For me, I have chosen to learn to understand, love and accept myself (human nature flaws and all). It definitely feels better and helps me to understand and love outside of myself much better, which in my opinion is the ultimate goal of the universe to love, accept and restore brokenness to ONE.

What have you been creating for yourself thus far? Change your mind, visualize your desires then release your wants to your Creator, you’ve now done your part; this is how you rebuild your trust in the universal flow. Change your mind from negative to positive, its not hard my friend all you need is for your intentions to be clear without judgment or doubt. Change your mind, I promise you can do it. Need some help, I’ll be glad to help you through it.

 

Detach from all expectancy. Allow people to be who they are. Every individual is on their own path of evolution.

When we allow ourselves and other people to freely be themselves while offering acceptance of individuals or circumstances; We do one of the two: 1. Grow in love.  2. Separate in love.

When we decide to grow together in love, relationships and circumstances bring the best out of us, not the worst. Growing in love, we realize there is a continual effort to build one another as well as the relationship. All parties are aware of this and equally participate in the growth of themselves, their relationships and others. There is lightness of flow, happiness that stems from the heart and a willingness to give without expectancy. The relationships provide peace, harmony and unity. The choice to walk in love has been made the key priority.

When we decide to separate in love, we acknowledge the fact that we are not good for one another. The situations or circumstances breed anxiety and fear. The relationship does not promote growth or embody love. There is constant discord and the unwillingness to compromise beyond oneself. Criticism, attack and blame seem constant. However, we don’t judge ourselves or the other parties involved. There is no blame necessary, as we have all played our parts.  The good. The bad. The ugly. We are aware and simply decide we are better off apart, well wishes given. No malice, hatred or bitterness felt. We separate in love, while allowing true fruitfulness of love to take form for others and ourselves.

Awareness of either choice is key. Remember there’s always an effortless flow to what’s supposed to be. In order to allow that flow, you’ve got to move yourself out the way and allow our Creator to dictate what relationships and or circumstances come and go for us. When we allow, we then enable freedom that offers a detachment to the outcomes we have formed for ourselves within. We then no longer feel the need to dictate or control how things take place or unfold outside of us. We simply allow and place our entire expectancy on our Creator, never on a circumstance or an individual.

Decide to make the choice to remain aware our own internal compass, our own continual growth. Decide to allow things to take shape naturally. Decide to drop feelings of animosity, blame and bitterness. As all these emotions come from an unwillingness of acceptance, to what we think or how we feel things should have been. When we attempt to control the outcome of circumstances or relationships we imprison ourselves emotionally and mentally.

    Let go. Be fee. Allow others to do the same damn thing. Repeat! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How do I not take offense when I am filled with words, actions and thoughts from the past? How do I learn to love, when the life I have lived, so full of abandonment, addictions and at times even hatred from those who claim to love and support me throughout my existence? What was the meaning of the experiences after all? To avoid love or live in pain either choice is one in the same.

How do I continue to do what’s right – I’ve been taught that life is supposed to be a fight. Now I see I have been misguided, entirely. God said his yoke was easy to carry, burdens light. So why do I feel as though I need to fight? I don’t actually. There aren’t any fights other then the wars created within me, stemming from negative thoughts I have decided to carry.  If I simply let it all go would there be any controversy, it simply would not be.

How and why do I fight to remain in control, control of everything outside of me? I realize this type of thinking is pure insanity. We are to work on things we can change; allow the rest to take form and be shaped by life’s universal energy. So what can I actually control? I can control me! I decide to take control by deciding not to focus on or judge things that’s happening outside of me, but instead do my part to transform my current version of reality. But how to do that is the key and that is to begin by transforming thoughts of fear, anger and hatred to acceptance, freedom and genuine trust in my creator.

I am aware that this type of trust that I speak of can only come from my spirit, my heart. I can control my emotions based on what my spirit tells me, not what my mind thinks it knows. I can control who and what I allow to affect my energy. This is where my work is to be done.

How do I remain true to who I know myself to be, if every person around me is trying to change and shape me into what they want me to be? After all, we were born to be unique, grow into whom we were born to be, a magnificent masterpiece filled with an abundance of love given to circulate more of.

The Lesson: Learn to love in order to dim the pain. Hurt people generally hurt other people way more then they likely know. Love trumps hate but very few people practice love, but would rather argue, disagree and make that their ultimate truth. Closing off to their core, their nature and this is to love, unite and create abundance of everything desirable, everything lovable, everything true within you.

Fact is this – until we change the cycle of hatred, anger and violence we recreate what we hate, as opposed to putting out flames by deviating from the fuel that adds to the flame.  In order to produce what I love, I’ll simply make the shift from the insanity of trying to control things outside of me to working on what’s inside of me and putting on God’s armor daily! (Ephesians 6:10-18 (NIV)

How far our power goes depends on what we choose to think, feel and meditate on. These emotions align with the forces of the universe, which in turn deliver the creations that we’ve decided on. Good, bad it really makes know difference. We will receive what we believe whole-heartedly and this is one of life’s laws. (Isaiah 59:21)

We are multidimensional beings. We aid in creation but don’t hold the power to dictate how it comes into fruition. When we are creating we are creating out of love or out of fear, the two never coincide. Here is how to discern the differences in the two and to determine what it is you have been creating for yourself and the impact it has on others around you.

When we create out of fear we are telling the universe we aren’t enough and to throw at us, what it wills. When we create out of fear we are often double minded, confused and unable to make solid decisions. This implies lack of vision and we all know from the good book, when we lack vision, we parish (Proverbs 29:18). If we feel incomplete and lack, we begin chasing external things to feed the soul. This will always leave us feeling empty inside. Always. When we create in fear we attract people, places and situations that drain us. When we create in fear we encounter people that don’t have our best interest at heart. When we create in fear we are not using our power; we often play the victim role. When we create in fear we walk in doom, one thing after another. We now feel powerless and often wonder what’s the point of it all. But get this – you can turn away from creating a life of fear, into a life that provides and promote a life you love.

Its when we align our mind, emotions and will according to the divine plan is when we feel whole, happy, complete and at peace. When we create in love, we are hopeful and optimistic for all. When we create in love we know longer have to seek externally. When we create in love, we love what we have as we are grateful souls. When we create in love there isn’t any resistance, things flow naturally there’s know need to question. When we create in love we have a sense of solid protection, we know that no weapons formed against us shall prosper, ever (Isaiah 54:17). When we create out of love we embody confidence, joyfulness and creativity that brings wisdom, passion and excitement to all who encounter us. When we create in love we create acceptance and unity. Being in full acceptance of our own works is key to living happily.  But how can we be in acceptance of our works if they promote fear, lack and inequity? Therefore pay attention to how you treat yourself as well as other beings equally.

Be authentic. Be honest. Pay attention to what surrounds you. Remain in awareness of what thoughts are feeding you. It’s when we are in touch with our perfect, limitless existence that we begin to recognize and atone for our misguided focus of attention. We lose our power to create positively when our perceptions are altered. Let me be clear, all things created in fear is false and keeps us living a life of despair.

Once that shift of awareness takes place so does the way we create! We then begin operating in love, instead of fear and hate; this now causes us to walk away from all things false and into what’s true. Your ability to see things clearly has risen for you! It’s as if your eyes have just been open! Your ability to create magically now takes place and presents itself in physical forms. People, places and situations are now working with you, not against you. You’re now living a life you love, not one you hate. The universe now supports you and begins to bring you what fills your core, not only individually but also universally! Now, lets take back our power and choose to see things through lenses of love when we create, as this is, how far our power actually goes.